Funny life quotes


Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something

― Wesley Lowe
funny life quotes


Life is too short to learn German

― Oscar Wilde





funny life quotes

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye
― Cathy Guisewite
funny life quotes

Life is a disease: sexually transmitted, and invariably fatal.

― Neil Gaiman
cute funny life quotes

Life's hard. It's even harder when you're stupid.

― John Wayne


best funny life quotes
Give a man a fire and he's warm for the day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life

― Terry Pratchett
funny life quotes

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive

― Elbert Hubbard
funny life quotes
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.

― Jane Wagner
cute funny life quotes

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

― Woody Allen
funny life quotes

Reality continues to ruin my life

― Bill Watterson
funny life quotes

To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.

― Reba McEntire
funny life quotes

Life is hard. After all, it kills you.

― Katharine Hepburn
funny life quotes
The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware.

― Henry Miller
funny life quotes


Life isn't fair, it's just fairer than death, that's all.

― William Goldman
funny life quotes
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

― Groucho Marx
funny life quotes

In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on

― Robert Frost
funny life quotes

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans

― John Lennon
funny life quotes

The longest five years in a woman’s life is between twenty-nine and thirty

― English Saying
funny life quotes
Life is a dream for the wise, a game for the fool, a comedy for the rich, a tragedy for the poor

― Sholom Aleichem
funny life quotes

Life is half spent before we know what it is

― George Herbert
funny life quotes

Life is too short for a long story

― Mary Wortley Montagu
funny life quotes

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.

― Oscar Wilde
funny life quotes

Life is too short, and the time we waste in yawning never can be regained

― Stendhal
funny life quotes

Life is too short to work so hard

― Vivien Leigh
funny life quotes
When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Then find someone who's life has handed them vodka and have a party

― Ron White
More life quotes

funny life quotes
Love is . . . Being happy for the other person when they are happy, Being sad for the person when they are sad, Being together in good times, And being together in bad times. LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF STRENGTH. Love is . . . Being honest with yourself at all times, Being honest with the other person at all times, Telling, listening, respecting the truth, And never pretending. LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF REALITY. Love is . . . An understanding so complete that you feel as if you are a part of the other person, Accepting the other person just the way they are, And not trying to change them to be something else. LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF UNITY. Love is . . . The freedom to pursue your own desires while sharing your experiences with the other person, The growth of one individual alongside of and together with the growth of another individual. LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF SUCCESS. Love is . . . The excitement of planning things together, The excitement of doing things together. LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF THE FUTURE. Love is . . . The fury of the storm, The calm in the rainbow. LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF PASSION. Love is . . . Giving and taking in a daily situation, Being patient with each other's needs and desires. LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF SHARING. Love is . . . Knowing that the other person will always be with you regardless of what happens, Missing the other person when they are away but remaining near in heart at all times. LOVE IS THE SOURCE OF SECURITY. LOVE IS . . . THE SOURCE OF LIFE!
― Susan Polis Schutz
funny life quotes
It was many and many a year ago, In a kingdom by the sea, That a maiden there lived whom you may know By the name of ANNABEL LEE; And this maiden she lived with no other thought Than to love and be loved by me. I was a child and she was a child, In this kingdom by the sea; But we loved with a love that was more than love- I and my Annabel Lee; With a love that the winged seraphs of heaven Coveted her and me. And this was the reason that, long ago, In this kingdom by the sea, A wind blew out of a cloud, chilling My beautiful Annabel Lee; So that her highborn kinsman came And bore her away from me, To shut her up in a sepulchre In this kingdom by the sea. The angels, not half so happy in heaven, Went envying her and me- Yes!- that was the reason (as all men know, In this kingdom by the sea) That the wind came out of the cloud by night, Chilling and killing my Annabel Lee. But our love it was stronger by far than the love Of those who were older than we- Of many far wiser than we- And neither the angels in heaven above, Nor the demons down under the sea, Can ever dissever my soul from the soul Of the beautiful Annabel Lee. For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams Of the beautiful Annabel Lee; And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes Of the beautiful Annabel Lee; And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bride, In the sepulchre there by the sea, In her tomb by the sounding sea
― Edgar Allan Poe